Goodbye 2010, Welcome 2011

As 2010 is coming to an end, I begin to reflect on what 2010 has been for me. Overall, I have mixed feelings towards this year. I have had my worst and best moments.
The beginning of the year had been the most stressful and distressing period of my life. Then, the period of self-pity, soul-searching and reflecting my life. Now, almost a year later, I have accepted the fact that 'what has to go, has to go'. There is just no turning back. Self-pity is self-destruction. There are many more unfortunate people out there. I began to understand this after reading news about deaths of youths, esp my own student. I also heard stories from students who had lost their parents at a young age of 4 and another 2 lost their parents too this year.
As compared to them, I had 33 years with my mum. It was not enough but again, I have to let go.
The kids still often talks of their Po-Po especially Jerilyn. Out of nowhere, she will ask questions like:

• Do you love Po2?
• Why is Po2 in the church?
• Who bought this? Is it Po2?

So, that was my worst moment. My best moments are definitely related to the children.
Jerilyn @ 4yo,

• she is more mature, understanding and caring. She gives in to her sister to avoid getting ear-splitting screams. She 'saved' her sister by pulling her back when she saw me in the car while they were playing the compound (my dad was in the house). When I scold Jesslyn, Jerilyn will stand up for her "Mummy don't scold her. Next time, I don't want you. Mei2, don't cry."
• she can read (I presume > 400words)

Jesslyn @ 2yo , the greatest development should be these:

• from baby-talk to a little conversationalist. Recently, she likes to play pretend call "Hello Daddy? Jie2 finish the papaya. Buy burger for me. Huh? Huh? Thank you Daddy. Thank you Daddy. Byee.." She can explain her actions/choices "I am scared of the clown. That's why I cry." "I don't want (this dress). It's too tight." "I want to boo-boo. I have stomachache."
• from diaper dependent to 100% toilet trained

I have put down a short list of resolutions and to-do list for 2011. I hope to achieve them as I have achieved my 2010 list. Welcome 2011!!!

Jesslyn @ 2yo

Jesslyn has just turned 2 on the 8th December. There wasnt any party except for a quiet dinner at Folie Folie on the night before and a cake on the actual date.

2 short years have passed and she is still very much the baby I held in my arms 2 years back. Here are some of the things she could do/say:

• Talks very well and uses long sentences. Just today, sis was disturbing, she scolded "Hey, dont disturb me. I am doing my work." (She was scriblling on Jie2's book).
• She sings very well. She sees a kettle in a book and she starts "Polly put the kettle on... " While her hands are at work, she entertains herself by singing. She is also flexible in changing the lyrics. For example, the song 'I see the moon and the moon sees me', she goes "I see Gong Gong, I see Mummy..."
• Potty-trained. Must add that accidents still happen. With Jerilyn, we were braver by letting her go diaper-free during the nights but with Jesslyn, we are more cautious.
• Jumps and climbs.
• Other than Wh- Questions, she also uses "Can" types of questions - "Can I go down?", "Can I have water?"
• Can recite all the letters in the alphabet and numbers up to 20.

Some of the things she still needs guidance are:

• recognising letters in the alphabet - she particularly likes 'J'. Show her any letter, she says 'J'
• recognising numbers
• confused with certain animals

Quotations

Meant to be posted 2 months ago but something held me back:

• While I was driving down a slope speedily, Jesslyn exclaimed "Be careful! Mummy.... Be careful! Mummy..."
• While shopping on 1 particular day, Jesslyn was being grumpy. Daddy scolded her twice and for both times, she sang to herself after being scolded.While waiting to pay at the cashier, Jesslyn held out her hand and said "Give me some money."
• Seeing angry/sad expressions on people, Jesslyn would ask "Why she(always she) so sad?" or "Why she cry?"
• When Jesslyn was proud of her sis, she showed me a puzzle "There.... Jie2 fix this. Jie so clever."
• When it irritates Jesslyn "Hey, dont sit here." "Hey, stop playing." "Hey, don't shout."
• When she is persistent "Mummy, sit here" Nobody answers. "Mummy, sit here!!" Silent. "I saaidd SIT HEREee!!"
• Jesslyn uses 'Today', 'Yesterday' in her sentences but it's not always used correctly.
• Looking at a mini poster of S.H.E.(the Taiwan group), Jerilyn said there are 2 girls. I asked "Are you sure? How many girls are there?" She repeated "2 girls." "What about this 1?" "It's a boy."(Referring to the 'tomboy')
• Jerilyn talks to objects and insects:
• to an insect "You go away. I don't want you. I will beat you. Go away."
• to an object "Don't fall down. You stay there. Be good."
  

Getting Ready for School

I occasionally buy workbooks for Jerilyn to practise writing. However, her interest lasts as long as the smell of a new book. After writing and scribbling few pages, her interest fades and the book has to be shelved for at least a week before one day, she happens to spot it from the shelf and starts scribbling again. This is so except for the 2 books which I bought about 2 weeks ago.
The moment I bought the books, she has been doing the exercises non-stop. She is so engrossed with the exercises that she spends 2-3 hours each night on the exercises. On the first night, she didnt even have breaks in between. I was the one who had to stop her as my eyes were already drooping. When it is time for bed, she insists on taking the books with her into the bedroom and won't stop writing 'til we turn off the lights. She is so into it that right after waking up from her afternoon naps, she says "I go down to do my work, ok?" There was once she immediately sat and started doing the exercises the moment we came home from shopping.
The 2 books are published in Singapore. I have a few books of my own which were bought in Singarpore many years back and indeed, there are still one of my favourites. These 2 books are as appealing to my daughter as those books to me. In short, Singapore published books have better quality thus more appealing to readers?
It seems like she is preparing for school. She always says that she is attending school (soon) and calls me 'Teacher' while she is my student. After each exercise, she wants a star to be given. She thanks me very loudly with full sincerity. When she makes mistakes and doesnt get a star from me, she sulks.
Wondering if most children go through this stage where they show extreme enthusiasm in studying and schooling.

Quiet yet Eventful

Some of you must be wondering where have I been for the past few weeks. No blogs, No Facebooking. Have been as quiet as a mouse on the cyberspace.
Though quiet here, my life has actually been quite busy and eventful. There have been numerous decisions to make in the past month. Firstly, I came across AirAsia's promotion to Australia and was tempted to grasp the cheap air tickets. I finally did after much persuasion from my sis.
Next, I had to decide if I needed to change my car as my hubby complained about the poor condition of my Saga. During the process, we narrowed down to Matrix and Kenari. After 2 weeks, we have decided to go for Kenari as there have only been negative comments for Matrix. I don't want to take the risk.
Other than that, I was also burdened with the decision of where to send Jerilyn for kindergarten. There are two potential kindergartens in my area. 1 has enrolment of 100+ and the other has only 10 kids. I personally prefer small groups to large groups but upon visiting the less populated kindy, I understand why the other is over populated. To me, the main problem is impression. The impression the teachers here gave was unprofessional. Both the teachers I met have long hair and both just let their hair loose. It's alright if they look tidy but sadly, that's not the case. The teacher who entertained me spoke terrible English. It was very Manglish. Moreover, I doubt this kindy has a proper system as overall, there are only 10 kids from all ages.
Last year, this time, we took my mum to Meru Valley Golf and Country Club to check out the plaece. After procrastinating for a year , we had finally taken the trouble to join the club. One of the reasons we join this club is to avoid the congestion in a public pool.
We also booked 2 nights at Resorts Hotel, Genting Highlands in conjunction with Jerilyn's birthday upon coming across another promotion for Genting Club members.
The only mission we have not accomplished is going to Singapore. It's not for leisure but business. However, there are too many activities and going-ons now. I need a break. Need to save some $$ too.

Mozilla vs Explorer

I usually use Explorer when I suft the net. However due to the high recommendation for Mozilla, I sometimes turn to it. It has its advantages over Internet Explorer. What I find peculiar is when I browse my blog, the layout is different from what I did in Explorer. Why? Why? Why?

What has Jerilyn been doing?

One of the earliest word she learnt to write

Mummy asked "What's this?"

Jerilyn answered "Jo-ann."

Sometimes, Jerilyn may spell and write from right -> left.

As for numbers, if its '23', she says 'Thirty two'

At 3y9m old, Jerilyn could complete this 48pcs puzzle in a breeze without help. This photo is taken by her to show off her achievement.

I have actually kept this in the cupboard for a few months because these naughty dinasours(as Jerilyn claim) tend to throw the pcs around and I have to find the missing pcs each time.

I took it out 1 fine day as hidden, old toys are like new toys. The 1st time, I helped her. The 2nd time, she took me by surprise by showing the complete set in less than 15mins.

Kuala Lumpur Trip

With the proliferation of modern modes of transportation and the affordable air rates, people in this century are travelling much more than the last. Travelling across the globe is not only for business but leisure is in the list of the majority now.

No. I have not been travelling across the globe. However, I have my own share of travelling and adventures and during the last Deepavali, we went to Kuala Lumpur.

I was excited about the trip as I love travelling to the city. I started planning and packing a few days before the trip. However, I am one of those who like to pack the minimum and prefer to buy when the need arises. Thus, I only packed 1 set of pyjamas and 1 dress in case 1 of the kids dirty their clothes. I brought the lightest clothes for myself. Hubby was the 1 with enough clothes to change for 2 days.

Another reason for the light luggage is because we planned to travel using the public transport. Daddy was lazy to drive and I like the idea of the kids experiencing the new electric train. We had a smooth journey on it which can speed up to 140+km/h.

Our journey started at 11.15am. Surprisingly, the train was punctual. The journey from Ipoh railway station to KL Central took 2hours. From KL Central, we took the lrt and a taxi to reach our destination, which is the Cititel Hotel at Midvalley Megamall. For RM200++ a night, I was quite disappointed with the hotel room. Anyway, I don't want to dwell into it. Let's move on.

After dropping our luggage, we headed for KLCC. Spent 6 hours shopping and visiting the Aquaria. Towards the end of the day, all of us looked like we came back from hell. We were back to our hotel room at 9pm, took our much needed shower and had a scrumptious dinner at Dragon-i, which was right at the lobby. From hell to heaven ... relaxing comfortably while having juicy steamed dumplings(its famous delicacy). I am not into shooting photos of food, so no photos to share.

We spent the next day in The Gardens & Midvalley Megamall. Did some shopping at Isetan and Metrojaya. To enjoy the massice discounts, I applied 2 membership cards for the past 2 days. We took some great pics of the kids. This time around, it isnt only 'Peace' sign from Jerilyn as you can see from the photos. There are more in Facebook.

In short, travelling with 2 young kids is definitely a challenge and physically demanding. Nevertheless, it wont stop us from travelling together. Friends have always asked "You bring your kids along (when you travel/shop)?" or suggested "Leave your kids with your parents while you go shopping/holidaying." The idea is absurd. I just couldn't bring myself to leaving the precious ones behind while I have a good time elsewhere. I know....it's crazy but it's how I feel.

Do boys get intimated by girls?

Do boys get intimidated by girls? Or is it just natural that boys dont like to play with girls?
Jerilyn has always been a tough girl and prefers to play with boys than girls. She loves tools more than dolls. She loves active activities more than passive ones. She watches the boys play computer games and makes sound effects just like the boys. I notice that other girls dont watching boys playing pc games.
However, not many boys welcome her. They shove her away when she comes near. They think that she is invading their privacy. They claim that she is loud. Probably, they dont like it when a girl makes better sound effects for example a car roar or gunfire than they do.
How much can you tolerate your kid being bullied? Me, it's almost Zero. It's ok if they fight over space or toys but if other kids say things like "Go away." or "Dont touch this." and my kids look helpless, I will defend them.

Terrible Twos

Kids change and learn everyday, sometimes at a slower speed, other times they experience growth spurt. Just last week, I was saying that Jesslyn had added Why questions in her dictionary. Now, she is bombarding us with endless Why questions. Here are some examples I remember:
Mummy, what are you doing? I am cutting the oranges.
Why are you cutting? For you to eat.
Why for you to eat? because you like orange.
Why you like orange? ???

Mummy, where's the beetle? I have thrown it away.
Why you throw it away? Because it's dead.
Why is it dead? Because I killed it.
Why you kill it? because it's a nuisance.

Mei2, don't stand on the stairs like that.
Why dont stand? Because it is dangerous.
Why is it dangerous? Because you may fall.
Why you may fall? Because if you are not careful, you may fall.
Why not careful? ???

They are very opinionated too, with character.
When Jesslyn doesnt want something for eg food, she says I don't want, folds her arms firmly and looks away with her head high. It's really cute to see that from a 2yo toddler.
Besides having opinions about themselves for eg choosing the clothes to wear, they also have opinions about you. For example, Jerilyn used to tell me if SHE THINKS I don't look good wearing something or if my hair is messy and needs a brush.

This is the time they test their freedom and rights. They want to exert independence and give us the 'I can too' message. Jesslyn is going thru the phrase Jerilyn went thru such as wearing her own clothes and shoes. If you so much so as to help her, she might throw her tantrums. She would remove her clothes and put them on again!!! When she is done, she will parade in front of you and exclaimed You see! You see!Sometimes, 2 legs would end up in 1 pants hole. When this happens, she walks around slowly until some1 sees her.

I came across 'Terrible Twos' and found that it means a development stage when a toddler is about 2yo. I have never associated my condition with this term until now. However, I have a different understanding of this term. To me, 'Terrible Twos' means having 2 mischievous kids esp if they are about the same age. When alone, they play quietly. But, when put them together, things become chaotic. When they play, they bring the house down. When they fight, they bring each other down. Look at what Jesslyn's bite did to Jerilyn's arm.









This is what I call 'Terrible Twos'.

The Lost World - 16/10/2010

Over the past few weeks, Daddy had been very busy with work; so busy that he worked more than 15hours a day and weekends too. I had been patient and tried to be an understanding wife. Finally, his ISO project was approved last week. Although this is not the end of it, at least he can breathe a sigh of relief for the time being.

As compensation for abandoning us, he took us to The Lost World of Tambun last Saturday. It's a combination of natural limestone hills and hot springs and the man-made sandy beach and amusement park. It's priced at RM38/adult, RM32/child below 12yo but above 90cm. Hubby said that parents often hope that children will grow up faster but this is the time we hope they grow slower.

Our first station was the Petting Zoo. As the name suggests, most of the animals are fit as pets. You can find raccoons, hedgehogs, guinea pigs, rabbits, monkeys, parrots, hamsters, skunks, snakes; to name a few. As the zoo is created against a hill, complete with waterfall, the walk was more interesting and adventurous than visiting a normal zoo where you walk on smooth tar roads. Another plus point for this zoo is that we can have a closer look at some animals, so close that there are zoo-keepers who also serve as guards to guard against animal abuse and stealing. I notice this when we were at the hamster booth. Some naughty kids were pushing and disturbing the hamsters. The zoo-keeper watched the kid like a hawk. She didn't say anything though. Other than that, you can also touch the rabbits, guinea pigs and some other tame animals. They may be tame but for people who haven't been closed to animals much, the close contact can be quite an experience and a shock. A rabbit, for instance, stood suddenly with their paws on the fence. I was kneeling with Jesslyn and imagine our surprise when the rabbit came eye-to-eye with us. Both of us actually jumped out of fright. Nevertheless, I encouraged the kids to touch the animals but Daddy was against the idea. He is quite paranoia about diseases and cleanliness.

After exiting the zoo, we spotted some swans, geese, tigers and horses as we walked quite a distance around the park. A sculpture of a gorilla caught the kids attention and even til today, Jerilyn is talking about it as if it's a real gorilla. Later, I was excited when I saw a sign 'Pony Ride' ahead but was I disappointed when I saw 2 horses(which claimed to be ponies) locked up in a small ranch. I was disappointed for 2 reasons: 1 is because the pony ride is not available (for the kids) that day. 2 is because I feel sad for the confined horses. I am no animal activist but I don't understand why these horses are confined in a 20'x20' ranch when the park is so spacious.

So, our next stop was the carousel. The kids took only one slow ride on it before we headed for the water park. The video and photos(which I will upload later) speak for itself. Daddy had a spot for himself too that is the hot springs & spa. The water was more than 40 degrees Celsius. Jerilyn only put the tip of her toe into the pool and retracted. She is one who h

ates anything burning or hot. As she walks on the sand, she was complaining that it's hot. At other times, she won't eat if she thinks that the food is too hot for her tongue.

As for me, I am happy watching the kids having fun. I enjoyed watching them play and laugh. They are definitely more daring than mommy. At less than 2yo, Jesslyn went on a slippery, very sloppy slide. Jerilyn moved her limbs like a 'desperate' armateur swimmer. Probably 'determined' would be a more appropriate word. She depended on her stomach to keep afloat. Adorable! I, on the other hand, isn't as adventurous as my kids. I don't like to get wet. I only allowed the water to go up to knee deep.

All in all, we spent 4 hours at The Lost World. That's enough for the kids to be lost in their dreams the moment they got into the car.

Jesslyn @ 22months

Can't recall when Jerilyn started bombarding us with WH- Questions but I am sure it's way after 2yo. As for Jesslyn, she picked up questioning skill from her sis since she was 19months old. Lately, she has added WHY questions as well.

• Why you cry? (she may also get a tissue and rub your tears. So sweet.)
• Why so sad? (if you look sad)
• Why close the door?
• Why Daddy go swimming(bathe actually)?etc...

Some of the Don't instructions she gives are:

• Don't touch.
• Don't read. (when she needs me while I am reading)
• Don't sit. I want to sit.
• Don't sing. (if you sing when she is singing. Very possessive, isn't she?)
  

As for toilet training, I mentioned that she doesnt use the napkin during the daytime. Although she wears diapers at night but based on the past 2 weeks records, she manages to control her bowel til the next morning for more than 60% of the nights, meaning the diapers are dry. I will still put her on diapers. Can't take the risk yet. Other than that, she hasnt been pooing her in her diapers for at least 2months. When she needs to do her big business, she will announce it and we will take the time to go up the stairs to use the toilet upstairs. We have one of those baby toilet seats but the two of them hardly use it. Jerilyn didnt use it because she tend to shee outside the toilet seat. Is there something wrong with the mould? How do other kids use it then? Jesslyn doesnt use it simply because I never make it habit for her to sit on it. If you put her on a baby toilet seat, she feels uncomfortable.

Voice Mail

If you are familiar with the voice mail system in Malaysia, you would know that it comes in at least 3 languages, all in one voice mail. This recording was taken when she made a call to her dad and the call was forwarded to a voice mail Dont expect much, just want to share. Do listen til the end.

Our Routine

After the application for the maid has been cancelled, we decided not to employ any maids for 2 reasons. Firstly, by the time the next application to be successful, which could take 3 months, Jerilyn would have started schooling and we dont really need the maid anymore. Secondly, I dont have to go through the 'Life with a Maid' ordeal again(sounds serious huh?). So, instead of getting a permanent 'pain in the back', I'd chosen part-time maid who only comes once a week.
It has now been 2 weeks since the semester commenced. Things have been quite manageable with the help of my dad and MIL. When I have full day classes on Mondays and Tuesdays, dad will take care of Jesslyn while Jerilyn with my MIL.
On other days when I only have half day work, the kids stay with my dad. The routine is dad coming over at 7.30 as that's when I go to work (for this sem). He lingers around til the kids wake up between 9.00a to 10.00. Ah Gong prepares them for another new day and they usually go out for lunch 2 hours later. By the time they return home, I should be on my way home. When I reach home, my dad goes home and I dutifully continue my work at home; play with the kids, teach some reading and writing, chat and later, put them to bed. While they sleep, I sweep and mop and clean. While waiting with anticipation for the door to open and footsteps down the stairs, I surf the net and enjoy a cup of afternoon coffee.
On a lucky day, they could sleep for 2 hours. After they have recharged, they continue messing up the house again. Sometimes, they watch some Barney or Strawberry Shortcakes shows. We have our dinner at 7pm. This is the only time I can enjoy my one hour tv programme for the day. I only have to cook rice. The dishes are home delivered. For RM138 per month, I get 2veg + 1meat for 6 days a week. After the 7pm Chinese programme, I mop again and bathe them. After that, we normally do some reading together (I dont like the kids to get sweat again)although the kids prefer more hyper-active activities while we wait for Daddy to come home. When my assistant is back, we begin to wind down and prepare for bed. It used to take my an hour at least to fall asleep but nowadays, I easily doze off the moment my head touches the pillow.
This summarises my routine from this month 'til dec. After that would be another story.

* Jesslyn's new skill is drawing a Fish. Dont have a picture to share yet.

Jesslyn's Linguistic Skill

At 21months, having simple conversations with Jesslyn is not a problem. She seems to understand whatever you say and is able to express very well. Some of the expressions I wish to remember are:

• When she hears thunder or an engine roar, she asks "What's that?" followed by running to me and says "I am scared. Too loud."
• After she has done me a favour like combing my hair, she requests "Say thank you, Mummy." and followed by "Ar... good girl." after I thank her.
• When Jie2 wants something from her and she is not in the mood, she says "No way."
• She often asks the meaning of words by asking "... means?" esp if you speak in non-English language.
• Some of the common Pronouns she uses are I, you, my, mine. My and mine are important survival words to her. Haha...
• "I take the bag", "Don't touch ...", "Go away", "Whose's that?", "Look at the time!"
• She uses "Excuse me" when something is in her way.
• She asks "Are you ok? Is it painful?" when she bruises or cuts on you.
• When she wakes up, the first thing she asks is "Where's daddy?" and the last thing she says before bed is "Good night (Daddy/Mummy/Mei2)" and each time, Jerilyn has to correct her.

However, she is still confused with certain animals. For example, she may claim that a dog is a gorilla, a duck is a chicken and a lion is a tiger and vice versa.

Here is a video of her singing a Mandarin song. Is she clear enough for you to figure out what she is singing?

Little Superstar

Sorry for the ludicrous view. Jesslyn refused to sing in front of the camera. So, if you still cant figure out, it's her legs you will be looking at.

Jerilyn's drawing

Here are some of Jerilyn's art collection.


Notice the eye-brows?









Angry Face









Stand Fan










Happy Face







Sad Face

Do you see a circle right below the head? She claims that its the stomach.
The 2 strong lines from the eyes are tears.

To the Pool

I had wanted to take Jerilyn to the pool for ages but never did (except once) til last Sunday. There were 2 reasons:

1. We are worried that the water is contaminated or not suitable for Jerilyn's sensitive skin.
2. We are just plain lazy.
I made up my mind that I must bring her to the pool this sem break. Not being able to swim has been 1 of the regrets in my life, thus it's my wish for my kids to learn the skill. Last Sunday, Jerilyn had a pee accident early in the morning at 8am which woke the whole family up. Therefore, hubby & I took this golden opportunity to head for the pool.

Daddy took Jerilyn down into the pool first. After a short while, Jerilyn came up and told us that she only wanted to sit on the bench. She was almost in tears. So, instead of persuading her, we persuaded Jesslyn to go down, knowing she is more adventurous than Jerilyn. She was reluctant at first. I thought we had to head home after only 5minutes in the pool. However, Jesslyn took a brave step to put her feet into the water, then her legs and sat on the stairs. The water was up to her lower waist. She was moving her legs and playing. Soon, Jerilyn followed. They splished and splashed and started to have fun. Daddy also gave them some swimming lessons, which was to put up their legs while hanging on to Daddy's arm and kick the water. They loved it. Jerilyn even asked me to try going into the pool.

Although I didnt swim but I was the one hunger for food. We packed our bag & left 45 mins later.

Daddy's analysis: Jesslyn is more daring than Jerilyn. However, once Jerilyn starts to experiment with something, she will use her creativity and imagination to produce new ideas. Jesslyn is more of a parrot. She will benefit from Jerilyn's creativity while Jerilyn will benefit from Jesslyn's bravery. They complement each other, dont they?
Another eg where Jesslyn is more daring is when she dares to use an exercise machine but Jerilyn, til now, still shakes her head when asked to try.

Excuses

Children nowadays are sharp tongue and full of excuses when it comes to work. They are disrespectful, inconsiderate and rebellious. Will mine turn out to be like them(or they are already so) when I get responses like these:

Mummy: Who did this? [someone did something naughty]
Jerilyn: It's Mei2.

Mummy: Jerilyn, (do something).
Jerilyn: You (do it). I am (excuse).

Mummy: Jerilyn, dont (do something).
Jerilyn: Yah, I know, but then, (excuse).

[Jesslyn was playing with water by pouring water from her bottle and swing her arms on it. Jerilyn saw the fun and joined her.]
Mummy: Jerilyn, stop Jesslyn from pouring the water.
Jerilyn: Ok. [But, she herself poured the water. I scolded her. After a while,]
Jerilyn: Mei2, you pour. I dont know how. [I am surprised she knows to save her butt by putting others in hot soup.]

Toys

I didnt have many toys when I was young. One of the most expensive toys I had is Lego which cost RM100++ 20 years back. Sis. and I took care of it and made sure we didnt lose any pcs (a few are missing) or break them. Just for the record, we love our other toys too.

My parents had kept Lego in their store until recently when my dad thought it is time to pass it on to Jerilyn. He passed the box to me last Saturday and Jerilyn has been having fun building bicycle, see-saw, swing and robot. 3 days later, the most dreaded thing happened. She broke 1 of the pcs. I was fuming inside. But to my own surprise, my reaction was much milder than I thought. I only gave her a piece of my mind and that's it. [Since the maid left, my temper does not go flaring so easily]. She tried to defend herself with accusing tone; saying that she doesnt know how to remove the pcs and that it's difficult to pull them away. Hmm.... so, it has become my fault?

More about Js'

# POTTY TRAINING(Part 3)
We should be happy that Jesslyn is toilet trained.[Yes, we are]. However, this doesnt come without inconveniences.Can you guess what is the inconvenience?
Imagine your, less than 2yo child, pestering incessantly for toilet - "Mummy, shee shee. Daddy, shee shee" in a quiet, almost romantic dining place. What would you do? At first, we tried to ignore her but she was getting louder and louder and also stood up in her high chair. I asked hubby to take her to the car as we had a potty in case of emergency. They went and returned but there was no shee shee. Most probably by the time we took her pleas seriously, she had relieved herself in the diapers. :-p

# SONGS

In addtion to the list of songs I posted a few weeks back, Jesslyn is also confident with these songs.

1. London Bridge
2. Row, Row, Row the Boat
3. Three Blind Mice (She can only sing 3 Blind Mice, See how they run)
4. Polly Put the Kettle on (She misses the word 'Kettle' tho)

# PRONUNCIATION & LANGUAGE
My dad always complain that Jerilyn cannot pronunce the 'l' and 'r' properly. Her 'play' sounds more like 'pay'. 'Jesslyn' becomes 'Jessyn' and what is worse is her name which consists of both 'l' and 'r' - instead of 'Jerilyn Goh Kai Lin', it's 'Jerrlyn Goh Kai Yin'. I feel that it's a temporary problem and most children will grow out of it. Dont they? But, sis thinks that she may bring this to adulthood. Will she?
I give her the benefit of doubt because she is learning a few languages and dialect. Her 1st language is English and she masters Malay language quite well. Other than that, she learns Teo Chew from her granny and also tries to communicate with her cousins in Mandarin. My aunts advise my dad to teach her Hakka dialect but my dad is not keen. He thinks that she is already learning too many languages for her age.

Life after Maid

1 week after the maid has gone, life has been good if not great. Good because there is nothing for me to get upset about and most importantly, I dont have to see her face. Yes, I hate her.
Anyway, on Monday and Tuesday, my dad was in charge of Jesslyn and MIL took care of Jerilyn. I was on leave on Wednesday & today(Friday). Hubby was on leave yesterday.
On Wednesday, I started my day at 830am and throughout the day, I was on my feet except the times when I had to burn dvd for my dad and facebooking. I changed my kids to day clothes, fed them, did the laundry, washed the dishes and did all sorts of cleaning. I swept 4 times and mopped twice. This excludes the numerous wipings I had to do cuz of the sticky, oily, dusty, dirty surfaces. I really wonder how others manage their house chores or am I suffering from obsession with cleanliness?
P/S I had to empty the potty about 20times too in a day!

Potty Training (Part 2)

Exactly 1 week after Jesslyn said No to diapers, I can proudly say that she 90% trained for daytime. Over the past 3 days, there has been NO accidents at all and I dont even have to ask her if she needs a wee. She herself will go to the potty whenever she has the need. As if knowing that it is 'not right' to wee in her pants, the moment she has the urge, she quickly throttles to the potty. Sometimes, there is no wee at all.
She didnt need the diapers during nap times too for the past 2 afternoons.
I believe it wont be long before she can go without diapers at night.
Jesslyn is 20m11d old.

Falling in Love

At 1 time, the mention of 'doctor' gave Jerilyn the shivers and taking medicine was more like taking poison to her. We could not persuade, bribe or threaten her. However, now, she has fallen in love with doctors and medicine.
She asks for medicine with just a cough. She even asks for medicine although she is perfectly fine. If she thinks she is unwell, she wants to see the doctor. How peculiar!

Some of you may be wondering what happens after the miracles on the 4th(Wednesday). She has been diaper free for 3 consecutive days (whenever I am home). I had to work in the morning so I couldnt tell what happened. But, I made sure she didnt wear her napkins since I reached home at 1pm on Thursday and Friday. On those 2 days, about 20%-30% of the number of peeing times ended up on the floor. Other than asking her frequently(about 1-2hours after the last pee), she herself is quite conscious with her urge to pee. She herself will go to the potty and sit on it every once in a while. Probably she has the urge but she could not tell her bladder to release. So, she ends up sitting, getting up, walking around it and sitting on it again repeatedly. Though Jerilyn was potty trained around the same age, but I'm still stunned at Jesslyn's readiness for potty training. It happened overnight from nothing to volunteering continuously to use the potty. She could hold her bladder too from announcing her urge to taking her shorts and walking to the potty which may take 10secs.

Potty Training @ 20months

Just a few days back, I was lamenting how much longer Jeslyn has to depend on pampers.
But, yesterday 'miracles' happened. It started with this:
1. I was getting her ready for bath time and as usual, she wanted to sit on the toilet bowl. I put her on it and to my surprise, she wee in it. It was the 2nd time she wee in the toilet bowl.
2. After bathing, we put in her napkin and about half an hour, she said "Shee2", pulling down her shorts. Very quickly I put her in the potty and to my surprise, she did it again on the potty. I was surprised she could control her bladder until she sat on it. Moreover, normally, she said "Shee2" AFTER she has wee-ed.
3. Only then, the maid told me that in the morning, Jesslyn said "Boo2" to her and the maid had enough time to put her in the toilet bowl(in grandma's house) before she did her thing.
4. Before bedtime, Jesslyn said the magic word again and did her thing at the right place!!!
Wasnt that a miracle?!

Short Conversation wt Jesslyn

Daddy has a habit of miss-calling me after work(so that I can estimate his return). Sometimes, Jesslyn would take the call but it is always cancelled before she could answer it. Few nights back, she answered the call again but this time, she accidentally called the house phone. Excitedly, she put down my handphone to pick up the other call. She said "Hello?" and waited a few seconds. Realising there was nobody on the other line, she replaced the receiver and quipped "I dont know?" Probably she was telling us that there was no 1 on the other line. She has an interesting slang which you can hear in the video above. Pay attention from the beginning.

Jesslyn shows her proficiency in the English language by using new words and 3word sentences everyday. She can also answer some questions in BM. The questions she understands include "Makan apa?" & "Anak siapa?" She herself can use about 20BM words which include habis, minum, apa?, makan, tidur, masak, tutup, duduk etc... However, very soon, the 2 have to start learning Cambodian as this maid is returning to Indonesia in 2 weeks time. I am really worried how they can communicate with a Cambodian who I heard are mostly English illiterate although their resume say otherwise. Mostly importantly, she must love kids and have patience. I am keeping my fingers crossed!

My Point

Meal times with my 2 kids can be tiresome at times but a breeze at other times esp when it comes to their favourite food or when they are in good mood.
1 of our favourite eating outlets is My Point in Ipoh Garden because (for unknown reason) Jerilyn always finishes the spaghetti served. Mind you, its not a kid's meal. If you ask her to choose between spaghetti or MacDonalds, she would say Spaghetti. To give you an idea how much she eats, I took a photo of it yesterday.


Before - Spaghetti that fits the King









After - She took all the spaghetti (small portion was given to Jesslyn) except for the pcs of chicken.




Other than this plate of spaghetti, she also took some mushroom soup, 2 slices of bread, half cup of mango juice and a cup of ice-cream for desert.
My 2 kids have always been quite independent. This includes eating. All we did is cut the spaghetti into chewable size for Jerilyn and holding the bowl for Jesslyn to scope her soup. She is quite clumsy at holding cutlery upright. She tends to tilt it until the contents spill over. The other patrons were so amazed with their independence and cute eagerness in eating. Some comments I overheard were:

• 3-y-o nowadays are so clever in feeding themselves and can eat so much. Even eat more than me.

• Look at the baby. Scoping the soup herself and enjoying every spoon.

Yup. They enjoyed their meal to the last bite.

Js' at 1y6m old

Singing @ 19months

I am trying to upload 1 of the songs that Jesslyn sang but it does take a while to upload anything. Sigh... So, before I share any videos, it's better for me to write it down before the news become stale news. Some of the songs that Jesslyn could sing (not whole) include:
a) Baa Baa Black Sheep
baa baa black sheep, have oo... wool, yhes sir... .. full...master..for the dame... boy...down the lane
b) Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
c) Hickory Dickory Dock
d) Old MacDonald
ey,yay,ey,yay,oo.. moo moo here, moo moo there... ey,yay,ey,yay,oo
e) Incy Wincy Spider
f) I Love You - Barney Theme Song
g) Humpty Dumpty
* Before I could post this, the video was finnaly uploaded. Yeah!

Welcome to Blogspot

Although I created this account with blogspot in 2008 but I never took the initiative to explore the features. I found it quite confusing and mind-boggling. Therefore, I had been stuck with spaces for a few years. However, recently, I am quite fed up with the errors and problems that I encounter in spaces. Firstly, I cannot access my website without having to sign into hotmail first. Secondly, I cannot upload photos since June. (Imagine not having able to share photos of my beauties!!!) Thirdly, I cannot stay login for long. Every other minute, I am asked to login again.
So, today, I give blogspot a try again and find that it isnt very difficult to create a blog at all. In fact, it is much more fun to play with as compared to spaces.
Hooray!! No more hassles.

Paper Origami

"Mummy, look at this. My flower". All ready in the vase.

Paper butterfly

Whistle

My Discovery

At 19m16d, Jesslyn
1. wee-ed for the 1st time in the toilet bowl. I was so ecstactic I screamed for my hubby to watch. He exclaimed that I was too excited I could be scaring Jesslyn.
A few days back, I blogged about having difficulty in training Jesslyn to use potty. I wondered what did I do or didnt do with Jesslyn that made her slow in potty training. After that, I exchanged experiences with colleagues and friends and realised that it isnt abnormal for Jesslyn to still wear pampers. It was Jerilyn who is quick in ceasing dependence on pampers (at 24 months). It looks like I still have to invest on pampers for quite some time.
2. used a few more new words intelligently.

• she said "heavy, heavy" as she carried her chair around.
• she used "pull down" when the wrapper was in the way to the wafer. She wanted me to pull down the wrapper.
• she played with the paper frog that I folded and said "Froggy, jump jump. Froggy, jump jump."
• answered in Teochew "Hao Chak"(Delicious) when her granny asked about the coke she was sipping.
• she said "brush your teeth" at pics of toothpaste and toothbrush and "kick the ball" at the relevant pic.
• she said "share Mei2" and passed the apple to her sister.

As for Jerilyn, other than her brilliant imagination, (today, she stood in the toodler's chair and galloped in it[horse]) she could recognise and spell about 40+words. She doesnt like writing. Everytime she writes, she only writes 4-8times before she becomes lazy and starts diverting my attention. She needs to be guided when it comes to studying.
Overall, they have a pretty good relationship except the times when they fight for something. Jerilyn always snatches from Jesslyn and this makes Jesslyn a complainer and defensive. Whenever Jerilyn touches her, Jesslyn would move away. Now, before Jerilyn could take anything from her, she would hold it tight to her chest and come running to me for rescue. However, Jesslyn still 'adores' her sister. She loves to copy her sister's every action, every move. Jerilyn sings, Jesslyn imitates, Jerilyn screams, Jesslyn screams louder. Jerilyn complains of pain on the hand, Jesslyn does the same. Jerilyn rolls on the floor, Jesslyn follows. I attribute Jesslyn's extensive vocabulary and communication skills to parroting Jerilyn. As a result, this boosts Jerilyn's confidence as not only Jesslyn copies her moves, Jesslyn also laughs like crazy at Jerilyn's funny actions.

Trained and to be Trained

It is so difficult to potty train Jesslyn. Til this very day (she is 19m now), she hasnt wee-ed a drop in the potty. She loves to sit, get up and sit on it again just for fun but no pee. On the bright side, she can poo in it once in a while. Unlike Jerilyn who was already day trained at 20 months and do not need pampers at night by 24months, I wonder how much more damage Jesslyn will cause on the environment before she stops wearing pampers.

Jerilyn has learned to put on and remove her t-shirt herself recently. You see, our normal bath time routine is Jerilyn leaves the shower first while I finish bathing Jesslyn. Recently, by the time we go out, Jerilyn proudly announces "Mummy. You see! I wear myself." As for differentiatin front and back, I taught her to look at the label. Labels should be at the back. So, she seldom have problems separating back from the front. Her only problem is she is not sure which is front or back when the shirt is stuck at her neck.

Jesslyn's extensive vocab

I mentioned that Jesslyn is more vocal as compared to Jerilyn at the same age. She can use up to 3 words in her sentences at 1y6m. Here are some of Jesslyn's common phrases and lines:
What's this?
Which one? (when she is frustrated)
I don't want.
Who draw/write this?
You see?!
Oh NO!!! (putting her palms on her forehead)
Ready? Get set... Go! (as she tosses the ball to you)
Watch this pleaseeee. (passing her vcd of choice)
Yati, wash/cuci bottle.
Mummy, go up.
Mei2(which is actually Jie2), upstairs. Mei2, oi-oi (sleeping).
Beat mosquitoe/cockroach (Sometimes, she comes to you with a squashed insect on her finger.)
Wear pampers, sit down, come here, read books, see you, kick the ball, drink water etc...
The one Mandarin word which is their favourite is Bu Yao. She doesnt like to be touched.... BuYao. She doesnt like the tv programme... BuYao. She rejects food... BuYao. In short, they dont say No to sth they dont like but BuYao.
She has no problem repeating after you in any language ie English, Mandarin, BM or even Teochew.

Sigh! Just when I want to stop writing, I hear another tear. Jesslyn tore another page from their collection. What to do with these kids? Ban them from reading?

Confused Jesslyn

Jesslyn communicate better as compared to Jerilyn at the same age. jesslyn is able to understand and answer some WH- questions as I have mentioned in my blog months ago. However, she is confused when it comes to identifying pictures. For example, she may say cat when she sees a tiger or dog. She says fish (non-specific) when she sees dolphin or any other similar sea creatures. She sees a bear in many animals. She also calls Jerilyn; Mei-Mei at times.
Jesslyn is also a copycat. She follows exactly what her sister does. Sit, jump, play, talk, kick etc.. just like Jerilyn. Even when Jerilyn complains about itchy hand, Jesslyn immediately does the same. Being a copycat is alright. It's part of growing up after all. However, little does she know her limits and she tries to do dangerous things beyond her limits. For example, climbing the sofa from the back, skipping down the stairs, doing somersaults on the bed and walking on 1 chair to another. This is my little Jesslyn.

A minute vs A night

Jerilyn is not one of those who just toss and turn in bed til she falls asleep. She wanders in the dark til she is bored and tired. Then, toss and turn on the bed til she sleeps. Yesterday, she was doing the same thing. Nonchalantly, I said to her, "If you are naughty, I will kick you out of the room." There was a minute of silence. Then, she opened the room door, ready to leave. As it was pitch-dark, I was afraid she might fall down the stairs. I asked quickly "Where are you going?". She answered sarcastically "You said I go out?" I replied "I was just kidding." Again, she persisted "You said I go out?" I couldnt persuade her to return to bed. She closed the door to our amusement.
What it seems like a minute later, she opened the door and announced "It's 7o'clock. Wake up. Wake up." like a cock-a-doodle-doo. At first, we pretended not to hear her or should I say, I was too puzzled with what she said I didnt know what to say. She repeated "It's 7o'clock already. It's time to wake up." After that, we concluded that she must have imagined spending 1 whole night outside the room (tho it was no more than a minute) and pretended that it was daylight when she came back. We were pleasantly amused with her creativity and laughed at her smart remarks. I told her it's not yet 7o'clock and it's time to sleep to which she replied "ok".

Cunning Girl

I can imagine how rebellious Jerilyn will turn out to be when she grows up. Now, she is quite defiant at times. She just know how to irritate you.
For example, she says 20 with a smirk even though its a 10. No wonder my mother said Jerilyn is sly (look) like a fox even when Jerilyn was only a day old in the hospital.
On some nights, she says "Good night Kai Lin(which is me)" and insists that I say "Good night Mummy(which is her)"
Other examples include insisting Ah Yee is Mummy and me - Ah Yee.
Many events and cute quotes that I wish to jot down but time flies and I have a memory like a sieve.

Rock-a-Bye Baby

It's very rare I can record a full video like this. They would usually want to be the cameraman instead of being the actor.
This is 1 of the few I have. Enjoy!
Next task is to record Jesslyn singing.

Am I a Housewife material?

I am in a dilemma.
My maid is leaving in 2 months time. Yet, I still cant decide if I should employ another maid or be a homemaker myself. If I were to continue working, I would feel bad leaving my kids behind at the mercy of a stranger. I wish to spend all(well not all) my time with my children. This is the time they need us the most. However, I doubt I can stay home 247; being a mother, a wife and a maid. After having the convenience of a maid for almost 2 years, I dread lifting my fingers on housechores. It's also stressful to be in the same house with 2 hyperactive toddlers, not for 1 week or 1 month but as long as they are in the house with me.
Sigh! Should I leave it to the coin to decide for me?

Experience at the Cinema

We took the kids to the cinema for the 1st time yesterday. Since Jerilyn has a collection of Shrek characters (thanks to McDonald's business idea), we thought Jerilyn could relate more with this movie. I was very excited about the 'adventure'. I remembered my childhood movie experience at the cinema was a disaster. My parents took me to the cinema for the 1st time when I was around 5yo. I was so scared of the big screen that I covered my eye with a kuaci packet. I could only cover 1 of my eye as the packet was that big of a size only. haha.... I remember switching the packet from left to right and back to left again. The movie was in black and white. According to my mum, I was making so much noise(probably crying) during the show that they had to give up watching halfway through the movie. They hadnt watch any movie since. Pity my parents.
Anyway, we bought 3 tickets (RM12 for adult and RM7 for kid). CH purposely chose side seats where there are only 4 seats. His rationale is most likely the 4th seat would be empty cuz Ipohians arent freaky to watch a movie alone on a Saturday night. So, we were all set for the movie, with sweaters, lollipops, popcorn and sodas to keep the kids occupied.
True enough, the 4th seat wasnt taken. The kids were sandwiched between us. I missed the good ol' days when we cuddled in each others arms. Now, we have to extend our arms as much as possible to pass the popcorn. Jesslyn sinked and relaxed in her seat. Jerilyn was slightly tensed. All was well until the bunch of ogres appreared. Jerilyn couldnt take it anymore and became restless. CH took her out and never returned. On the other hand, Jesslyn was oblivious to what's going on and enjoyed finishing the popcorn more than the movie. The 2 of us watched the movie til the end when all of a sudden, she cried. Thank God it was already the end. We left and met up with Jerilyn who apparently spent the time in those gaming centre.
Thats my 1st experience in my cinema with the kids

First Keyed Word

This was exactly what Jerilyn typed at my Yahoo Messenger window when all of a sudden, she thought of Po2.
pppppppppoppopppppp
She said "How to spell Po2? P-O-P-O" I thought she was just spelling it out orally, not realising she also keyed the letters until I returned to the window.
I am not sure what she understands about Po2's death but she talks about Po2 everyday. She'll voice out when she sees something that belonged to Po2. She often talks about our experiences with Po2 as if to remind herself not to forget her. Jerilyn would say "Go to Po2's house." and not Gong2's house. If she accidentally says Gong2, she would correct herself.

Portrait

"Mummy. Look at this! Look at this!" I wasnt sure what I was looking at so I asked "What is this?" She said in a high pitch, dont you know tone "Mummy lor."
Although it didnt look anything like me but I am proud that she has the sense to draw the hair, the face, the body and the limbs. She is an even better artist than me. Til now, if I were to draw, I am only capable of drawing stick portraits.

More Updates

Jesslyn's some bad habits, which I find quite embarassing if she does it in public. One of the bad habits is sniffing our finger(s) when she tries to sleep. Very rarely she can fall asleep without clutching our finger(s) and sniffing it. It looks like she is sniffing some kind of drug. Yikes! What a view! She also uses our hands to caress her face. Cute isnt it?
I have started encouraging her to use the potty but it hasnt been very successful. She will sit on the potty at her own free will (still wearing her napkin) and say "Shee Shee" but nothing comes out of it. As compared to Jerilyn, I am not very kiasu about potty training.

I dont know if it is a coincidence or I am being over-conscious. The English exam paper that I marked recently was about coping with the death of a father. It reminds me of my mum. I borrowed a Chicken Soup for the Couple's Soul book from the library yesterday. The 1st chapter is about missing the husband who had passed away. Again, it seems to relate to mum. Is there a message behind it?
Jerilyn is quite sensitive to certain words nowadays. When she hears or sees Jesus, hospitals, Po2 and churches, this is what she says "Mummy, you dont cry ar, pls ar."

Do your children use your words against you? When Jerily is angry, she uses what I said to her on me. All the disciplining backfired. She thinks she can do or say what you say. Probably all those freedom of choice and action I instilled in her have more or less influenced her. If she is angry, she says "Mummy (do something). I beat you." or "You go out." or "You sleep with Ginger." etc... Do you face the same problem?

With regards to my mum, Jerilyn talks about her everyday. Its weird that when at my dad's place, Jerilyn doenst ask for Po2 but whenever she goes to church, she would ask me "Where is Po2?" When she sees Po2's photo, she would ask me to call my mum and says "Mummy, dont cry ar." She still thinks that my mum would return 1 day. Yesterday when she saw my tearful eyes, she said "Dont cry Mummy. Everyday cry cry cry. Why you cry?" I told her that I miss my mum and I want to see her. Her reply was "Po2 not sick. She come here. She stay in the next room. Then, we say Goodnight. Sleep tight". Jesslyn, on the other hand, just calls out Po2 out of the blue, meaning she could be lying down when she suddenly jolts up and calls "Po-Po".

Jerilyn has learned to sing the whole of some new songs Humpty Dumpty, Hickory Dickory Dock, Happy Birthday (in Mandarin) and 2 mandarin nursery rhymes. In fact, Jesslyn too can pick up 2/4words from each line. Sometimes Jesslyn is even faster than the song.

Jesslyn's Milestones

1. Weans Night Feeds - 2.5months. I would like to make a correction here. She doesnt need any feeding between 11pm to 5am. Is 5am feed consider as night feed?2. Turns her body, holding her bottle while feeding, watches her fingers as if admiring them - 5months
3. Good hand control: Grasps and plays wt toys, arcs her body backward wanting to free herself, giggles while watching tv, lunges forward if she wants u to carry - 5.5months
4. Kicks vigorously. does pushups. eats solid(her 1st food is cereal, which is the easiest to prepare) - 6months
5. Stands on 4 limbs, moves around by slithering, sits up independently for a few minutes - 6.5months
6. Reacts to the word 'Bye', eats other solid food like bread crumbs and taufoo - 7.5months
7. Pulls herself up to standing position - 8months.
8. Climbs the stairs(4steps), understands bye2 and clap hands, plays 'tim chong chong' - 9months
9. Climbs full flight of stairs, dances to music, imitates sounds like 'yah', 'bah', 'che(jie)', walks a few steps with support, plays peek-a-boo, scribbles, weight 9.1kg,, height 74cm - 9.5months
10. Says "Daddy" clearly(She calls me Daddy too). Imitates animal sounds, has 8 teeth - 10.5months
11. Stands independently for >5secs, puts objects into containers - 11months
12. Runs(3-5 steps) to a target(it was food) - 11.5months.
13. Weighs 9.4kg at 76cm tall, walks 7-10 steps independently, climbs <6 steps up and down the stairs on her soles, added vocabulary, says Thank you automatically - 12months
14. Calls grandparents, calls Mummy(its her fav word now) - 13months
15. Drinks from straw, follows simple instructions "Close the door" "Put it down", "Keep it" climbs the sofa and tables - 15months14. Walks up & down the whole flight of stairs independently, goes up and down her 'car' and pushes it back and forth, gives orders to the maid "Yati, nan-nan", says 2 to 10 - 16months

To save time, it's easier to add Jerilyn's recent development (3y3m old) here: She could push herself up and down the toilet bowl., meaning she can do her toilet business totally on her own. She has started to write by following the lines and dots. She knows how to control the mouse.

New Life

Normally, people mourn and grieve for the deceased but often neglect and forget those who are living.
Thus, this time, I would like to dedicate this to my dad. One month after my mum had gone, we are putting life back in to our life; with some adjustments. My dad is coping quite well with his new life. When I said new life, I mean

• having to take meals alone (I passed by Simee kopitiam 1 fine day and saw Daddy reading newspapers while having a drink there. It hurts to see him alone when it used to be a pair)
• not having Mummy to nag at
• not having Mummy to complain to when he has a mosquitoe bite or a backache
• not having Mummy to share stories with. He cant share with me as I dont know many of their old acquaintances
• having to babysit his grandchildren alone(with the help of a stranger; the maid)
• not having Mummy to share and laugh together esp about their mischievous grandchildren
  It is cruel to take a loved one away from you but it is even more cruel for the dead to leave someone you love behind to suffer the pain and loneliness. Looking at his eyes, I know tears of goodbye must have hung in his heart. We dont really pour our hearts out but there is an understanding. Nevertheless, my dad is still blessed with 2 granddaughters who occupy half of his day and make him laugh and fret at the same time.
  We Miss You so much, Mummy!

Updates

It has been ages since I updated about my kids. Where shall I begin?
Let's talk about Jerilyn first. Over the months, she has learned to cycle the tricycle and oh! She just learned to use the mouse (device) yesterday. There is truth in 'Do not underestimate a child's abilities'. I never thought a toddler as young as 3yo can control a mouse. I mean.... when was the first time I touched a mouse? I have forgotten how techno savvy children nowadays are. I only held and guided her hand for a while before she could manoeuvre the mouse herself. This afternoon, she was playing shape & pattern games on the computer. In terms of reading development, she can spell and recognize a handful of words. She can count to 20 but she cant read some of the numbers.In terms of behaviour, she has picked up some bad behaviour. [There are many praise-worthy behaviours too but just like the media, good news is not interesting. So, let's skip that]. For eg, if she doesnt like it when you reprimand her or limits her freedom, she says "You dont talk to me. You go to hospital/work." to me. To Daddy, she says "Daddy, you go to Singapore." She can be very unreasonable when moody. She learns to warn her sister like the way we warn her. For instance, "Mei2, dont cry. You go outside." She confronts with her arms on the waist, "Mummy, why you scold Kai Lin?" "Why you throw this?"She also knows how to hurt you the most. That is by calling me 'Ah Yee' and my sister 'Mummy'. She would look at me slyly and call me me 'Ah Yee'; point at a photo of my sister and said "This is Mummy."
As for Jesslyn, I am sure you have heard that being the 2nd has an advantage over the 1st child. They have the upper hand of getting the experience earlier than the elder. They also learn through observation and parroting. These are some of the things Jesslyn can do and understand much earlier than Jerilyn.
She can count. You say 1, she says 2,3,4,5...9,10.. 12,13.
She can sing/hum Twinkle, Twinkle. She has no problem humming songs together with the television prog, her tone perfect.
To play certain car toys, you have to pull and let go so that the car moves forward, right? That's what she does. Jerilyn didnt understand 'letting go'.
She bends her head low (like the Japanese bow) when I turn on the shower, expecting her hair to get wet. I didnt teach her this. I still wonder where she learns it from. Her sister still struggles when I wash her hair.
She can imitate difficult words and short phrases very closely. For eg "I love you" "beautiful" "Jerilyn". She is cute when she says "Huh?" if she cant get what you said. She will repeat it many times til she can grasp the word and repeat after you.
She can answer simple questions such as "Where is ...?" Her immediate response is "There!", arm stretched out & index finger pointing even though the thing is nowhere to be found. "What is your name?" "Wei Wei." She understands Yes/No questions & For instance "Have you ...?" "Do you want ...?" "Are you...?"
Other than that, she can now walk up and down the stairs with the rails as support at 15.5months. Some of her favourite words are"Bu Yau ar" (She speaks Manglish)"Go Go Go" "Bau Bau" "Oi Oi"
Character wise, Jesslyn has better PR and more confidence. When she talks, she is loud and clear. Sometimes I find her a bit brash. She must have loved exhilarating adventures such as roller-coaster. She purposely stands at the edge of the bed or sofa and yells "Wouw... Wouw... Wouw". She pretends that she is falling. She doesnt cry like Jerilyn when she wakes up from her nap. If you beat her for being naughty, she stares at you and smiles cannily as if nothing happened.
Jesslyn is as 'wai siek' (gluttonous appetite) as her sister. She can eat even the hardest food ie 'ubi kentang'. She wont let you eat in peace if she is not given a share. In fact, I have to make sure that my house is never short of snacks to fulfil their big appetites. My sister can give a testimony on this. Like Jerilyn, she wants to feed herself too. When feeding her, she has to be given a spoon too so that she can feed herself at the same time. You cant solely feed her cuz she would rather not eat.

The Demise of a Mother

This is my umpteenth time trying to blog this but I still find it difficult to express how I really feel. There is not a day passed by which I dont think of her. The feelings of sorrow, guilt, regret, blame, hate and especially how much I miss her. There are many 'If only I ..." moments. Though her demise was expected but knowing that I wont see her again is the most excruciating experience ever. Knowing that she cant see my children grow(bringing Js to school in their little uniforms) is the saddest for me. Realising that she hasnt returned to JB for years and wont be able to anymore is my biggest regret.
My mum had been a pillar of strength and wisdom in my family. Now that she is gone, no one updates me with the latest news: which company has bankrupt, which company has bought over another, who is Jimmy Choo, what is Bernard Chandran's latest venture, what has Francis Yeoh bought lately. No one says "You dont have my genes when it comes to dressing." No one tells me "Do something to your (messy) hair." Less one advises me "Dont lose your temper on your children." When I was at my dad's today, I stared at the sofa that mum used to laze on. That was her favourite spot; reading the newspapers and playing sudoku. Now, it is just an empty, cold sofa. No more does it look familiar. In fact, it is foreign to me. I miss the familiar sight of her sitting with her legs crossed, her bifocals hanging loose on her nose, newspapers on her hands while her eyes focused on the television.
Since my mum joins God 2 weeks ago. Jerilyn talks about Po-po everyday. On one hand, she says "Po-Po with Jesus Christ", on the other, she still believes that Po-Po will return to stay with us. She would say "Po-Po stay here. Then, Po-Po sit on the chair. Mummy push." Sometimes, she thinks that Po-Po is still in the hospital. SHe tells the maid "Po-Po sakit, hospital." When she spots something which belonged to my mother, she says "Po-Po de" When she goes to my dad's house, she asks to be carried to have a closer look at my mum's photo. Jesslyn too calls out to Po-Po everytime she sees her photo. I hope they will always remember mum somewhere in their little hearts.
I cant undo the wrongs or do what is already too late but I will compensate by bringing up her grandchildren the way that will make her proud.
We love you always, Mummy.

Additional Member in the Family

Let me see. I havent written for almost 2 months. Have been extremely busy lately. In actual fact, I did not have the mood to blog. I had nothing to write about. I didnt have the mood to write. CNY was quiet and sombre although I am joyful that my sister(with her husband) have returned to celebrate it with us. This CNY, I dont have photos to share because my camera had broken down just when I needed it most. My daughters were looking like princesses (though they didnt act like 1) in those lacy dresses my sis bought. However, my camera works like magic now. I dont know what happened but on CNY 15th, I turned it on and voila! I started shooting pics of my daughters with my sis. Yes.... Juliana is still here. She has been back for 7 weeks and will return to Australia soon.
So, what makes me write again? DOG! I dont like dogs. I am the only person who hates dogs in the family. Although my family had brought up 2 dogs in my life but for unknown reason, I never like them. Anyway, one day, my sis and husband(dog lovers) found a labrador lying next to my car. The moment they opened my car door, it was claimed that the dog jumped into my car and they insisted that the dog and I are what the Chinese called 'yau yuen'. So, they insisted that I keep the labrador, a golden retriever. They took the golden retriever back to my..actually my dad's house. They claimed that Labradors are good for children's development.
Jerilyn is only as tall as the dog so she definitely jumps when the dog comes close. However, it didnt take long before Jerilyn went near the dog and tamed it; stroking its fur and ordering the dog to sit or 'come here'. Jesslyn screamed and tried to climb on me when the dog to her. The kids looked frighten but they enjoyed the screaming and playing. Later, we asked Jerilyn to give the dog a name and she came up with GINGER. We are pleasantly surprised with that name. 'Ginger' is perfect this dog. Dont you agree? Not only is the name most appropriate for the dog, its also gives the dog a class on its own. I usually hear human names on dogs which are not creative at all. I, myself am not creative. All of us couldnt think of a name. That was why we asked Jerilyn to name the dog. For this reason, I dont have the heart to give the dog away. Maybe it is good for my kids. I want my children to be animal lovers, unlike me. The picture below is taken from the internet. I havent got time to take a photo of Ginger yet.

Stressed

When you have a very ill person at home, you just dont have the mood for anything; going out, playing with (my) kids, watching tv and even indulging in food (my all time favourite). It also takes a few times more muscles to laugh. This is how I feel for the past few weeks. Having kids, low EQ and heavy workload make things worse
So, why do I have the mood and time to blog?
Have you ever felt such intense emotions that you feel breathless; that you want to explode? How do you release your stress? For me, writing is a way of releasing stress. I used to lament in my diaries. Since I dont anymore, I write it here. However, writing here isnt the same as writing the diary. I wrote freely. Anyway, all I want is for her condition to stabilise. Running errands and taking care of her is my responsibility. But having to worry what's going to happen tomorrow is a mental torture. I am drained out. It's exhausting mentally and physically. I need to have some peace of mind. That's all I ask.
What my Ah yee said keeps me going 'Just do your best.'

Creepy

Even though I understand that imaginary friends are normal for small kids but experiencing it is a totally different story. I am not sure if I being a Chinese has anything to do with the paranoia. I have always welcomed Jerilyn's resourcefulness and creativity in pretend games and sports. She sees dinasours and dragons while driving using the pillow and bolster. She pretends to make a drink(a cocktail I presume) from an imaginary machine. She uses cushions and pillows to skate. She slides down anything which is 30 degrees and above. She uses her 'toy' golf club to play snooker, hoki, baseball and golf (of course).
However, I feel awkward when it comes to imaginary friend. It happened 2-3 times before this but what happened yesterday gave me the goose bumps.
I was putting Jesslyn to sleep when I heard her talking downstairs. I thought she was talking to herself or the maid. When I came out of the bedroom, she was still talking as she walked up the stairs. Upon seeing me, she looked to her right, pointed at me and said "Call Mummy." Looked left, "No, not Jie2. Mummy....." Looked right again. "Call Mummy ar." I am not kidding that my hair stood a while as I am writing this. To some, this may be normal and there is nothing to be concerned about. To others, you may think that I am exaggerating. However, this incident gives me the creeps. My sister and BIL suggested that if this happens again, I could ask her who she is talking to or ask her to introduce her 'friend' to me. Yesterday, I only pretended not to hear her and walked down the stairs with her. However, as I was going down, I was very conscious (in case I knocked into anything).